Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Ang buhay nga naman... part 2

Those who praise me scourge me.. so is the opposite. The scourging at the pillar second sorrowful mystery in our history of salvation, the real new history of man the divine creativity of God of the creation.

Sorry I am using two names in many of my interaction here and there one jong the other john. One of my friends told me in one of our discourses was that I have a triple personality. 3-in-1 as the commercial always said. As I was reflecting on this truth of scourges, I may feel, there was some kind of shame within me. Because he was right that I'm living a double life, if not triple: Spirit during the day or light, then a flesh during the night or dark. Rebellious here rebellious there, saints here sinner there. I belong to communities called Charismatic or ecumenical yet I am but a prosti. Living the mask of hypocrisy. there's nothing more but I should be ashamed of myself.

I was really laughing (lol) even rolling to the ground (just like when we were in france laughing out loud in our last day from pilgrimage, angie know it she took pity este photo on us) when I read all the messages from angie's kumustahan till now. It was all joys and wonders!...

But I was stunned by the reality of it all amidst those laughter and jokes, humor, the explicit letter, the flickering of lights to katipuneros Andres and rizal, to trip to obando to jerusalem and Italy, to kapeng barako plus the prayer request, and of course the mug awards night. etc... there was some kind of journey towards spirituality that I realized by the still small voices within me and caused after shocked it was some kind of flames burning inside being consumed like gold on fire and as if there was sharp teeth grinding me: the contrasts, critiques, direct or indirect open or hidden insults or criticisms and oppositions, indifferences, debates or arguments, different ideas and opinions, differences in characters
and all these kind of unkindness, yet I am very grateful in all this kinds of discourses, it leads me to close my eyes within my own close- door room of selfishness, self-righteous-glorifications-pride of nakedness, imprisonment, emptiness, sickness and poverty, in return I became the least of all.. then and should really then lit a new candle/s for me!

Is this Eucharist?... I wish I can be full time here, there and everywhere!
This is my bread and wine not butter?!. Ang buhay nga namang buhay!

Ps.
But please, please :(
Not the all-saints-souls-day-candles ha or kandila sa mga patay..
huhuhu. Di ko na kaya 2!
Please :)

lol rtg
pray for our community and all
john-jong



ps. 2
kumusta na kapatid na angie ang unang araw ng pag iipon este ng
trabaho pala... miss ka na ng kapamilya at kapuso.





...it is the little silk thread which prevents the bird to fly... St.
John of the Cross.

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